[x]
All Deviations

Coming In Shallow by *Dagonus:iconDagonus:





Even ships that are long overdue pull into port eventually.
When time and meaning have faded away to endlessness,
The ragged sailors come on through.
Poseidon's crushing waves could only hold them for so many eons.

Their long lost eyes search for homes that aren't there.
Time is lost to them.
Their ships hit sandy bottoms that once were long below.
Where are the trumpets home?

Where is Athena's open arms?
They're still the boys who left their homes.
The world is so much bigger now,
And tiny like a ball.

Slowly the world catches back to them:
Nothing remains from old and everything
Is always still the same.
Who will greet the dead?
©2007-2008 *Dagonus
Details
Submitted: March 26, 2007
File Size: 846 bytes
Image Size: 5.8 KB
Resolution: 100×100
Comments: 1
Favourites & Collections: 2 [who?]

Views
Total: 44
Today: 0

Downloads
Total: 0
Today: 0

Thumb

Author's Comments

I don't know. I just had to write something. It was there. In my mind. Sometimes, you just can't find port the way you want to.
[x]

Devious Comments

love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0

~following-the-leader:iconfollowing-the-leader: Mar 27, 2007, 3:35:24 AM
Nice, I like the third stanza the most, and the opening lines of the last. Quite emotive, very sad and fatalistic, a comment on how the world goes on even when we are absent from it. Only two criticisms, the first being that it should be 'Where are Athena's open arms' (sorry, nitpicking!) because the 'is' breaks up the rhythm. That, and I'm not sure about the repetition of the 'lost' in the first two lines of the second stanza, although perhaps I am misinterpreting the intended rhythm of the piece. Good work :D

--
*Cat-Lovers-Anon

--

If I wrote down the things in my head, they would call me crazy.